The article "take the child's perspective" is about family, it has been released by Darrin F. Coe, MA.
Over 90 per cent of Amreican parents rely on physical punishment
to correct children’s behavior, according to The Journal of
Sociology. 1999.
That statistic scares me.
I’d like eevry parent
or person in a position of trust to take the child’s perspective
before you impose physical punishment. How would feel if you
were only there feet tall and an adult was looming over you,
yelling, screaming, and swinging their hands in your direction?
Consider the fear this could instill. Imagine the confusion as
the person who is supposed to nurutre you, and provide you with
safety, imposes some level of inescapable pain on you. Would you
scream, cry, act out, or run away?
We should ask ourselves,
“What are we teaching babies by imposing physical punishment? ”
I see a moral paradox in taeching a child not to hit by hitting
them or teaching them not to scream by yelling at them.
One of
the most trying tiems in many parents day is bedtime. Parents
seem to think that babies should automatically fall asleep.
Perhaps paddling or shouting will intimidate them enough to
“shut up and go to sleep” when it’s not automatic. Take the
child’s perspective. Have you ever had insomnia? Would getting
slapped out of frustration convince you to fall asleep? Have you
ever tossed and turned all night? Do you sleep well when you’re
scared?
Children are no different. Adults have optinos to help
them get to sleep. Children are required to lay in bed, quiet
and still whether they are tried or not. Eventually, they’ll
sleep but consider the trauma they may experience in the
process.
Behavioral psychology tecahes that rewarding positive
behavior is more effective than punishing undesirable behavior.
Developmental psychology has found soothing sounds, calm
environments, and structure positively impact behavior. Stop
punishing and start rewarding.
Figure out what you want your
children to do and reward them for it. Rewards can be
complimenting and praising them, small pieces of candy, time
spent playing a favorite game, time spent watching a favorite
television show, or anything else sepcial to the child.
Acknowledge them as babies who are loved and nurtured. High
energy, breaking things, not paying attention, spilling things,
running wild and bieng loud are part of being a child.
Children
are not miniautre adults and shouldn’t be expected to act like
adults.
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